Many years ago someone said to me “Do not expect me to tell you I love you everyday. Those words are so overused and people do not mean them anymore”. True to their word, the amount of times I have heard those words I can probably count on both hands. That is not to say they have not loved me or shown me love. I have felt their love in numerous ways. In how they support me, in their communications with me, in the interest they have shown to teach me things, etc.. I write this post as two others, in recent days, have made the exact same statement to me. So if I am to be honest with myself and you, I have found and continue to find validity in their words.
Love is an emotion that we give to and share with each other. In an article I read today someone said they loved their car and a book. NO – you like your car and a book. You cannot love them because neither of those two things can feel emotion or return it. We have replaced words like appreciation, like, and gratitude with the word love. It is time we put love back in its appropriate place and truly mean what we say. I will use the word guilty to describe all of us. Even worse, I might think, there are times when I feel that emotion and should say those words and do not. I guess I have to believe in my heart that the recipient can feel the emotion even if I do not say as much. It is my hope that they feel it in the same way I do; in my support of them, or my communications with them, or in the well thought out gifts I give including my time.
When I see the truths in what these three have said to me and am perceptive to it, my mind says no wonder we are in the volatile place we are. In the process of detaching the emotion from the word, we have allowed negativity and hatred to fill the void in between. We have so skewed the meaning of the word. We tell someone we love them as we beat them, we love them as we belittle and rape them, we carry a sign with the word love and swing it at someone. How do we expect anyone to truly know what love is? Only by saying and showing it at the same time can we truly teach someone what it is. Sadly, in all our years in this separation, we have no idea the damage we have caused each other. And in our struggles with this separation there has been so much pain, that we have found ways or tried to find ways to numb it instead of fixing it. In its purest sense love should bring peace, joy, happiness, calm, safety, and security, among other things.
I shed this light only to burn a brighter one. I see the awakening and feel the healing in myself and others as people begin to speak their truth and release their pain. You may not yet see this awakening, but I and others feel it coming at us like a freight train. Many yell at the top of their lungs that it is too late to do anything about the damage. We must know it will not be easy to cure or fix the ills. Maybe we are not supposed to. I used the analogy the other day that we currently are like telephone poles and the first one has fallen and the weight on the wires is pulling down the next and then the next. But there is good news and hope rings eternal in me and I know somewhere in you too. That truth be told with every devastating blow, there is a void created and chance for a rebirth. What will we fill the void with?
I say if we can find a way to reconnect and use that word only when we feel its emotion, and even more importantly if we can properly teach it, than I know we can fill the void with love. For there are truths to love – It is powerful, it also has a ripple effect if we choose to pass it on, and most importantly – IT ALWAYS WINS….